A Couple 'o Sea Turtles
by Goddess of the Keyblades
Summary: Was it REALLY a cargo ship that helped him escape the island, or did Jack Sparrow have some help from a Time Lord and his companion? Oneshot.


**Just a silly little oneshot that came to mind when I rewatched Pirates of the Caribbean yesterday. ^_^**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Doctor Who or Pirates of the Caribbean**

* * *

Amy was the first one to step out of the TARDIS. The Doctor was still giving out one of his usual speeches about how brilliant the universe is and how everything is an adventure.  
'Everything? Are you sure?' Amy asked as she took in her surroundings. The where on an island. A small, sandy, deserted island with nothing but the ocean surrounding them as far as the eye could see. The Doctor stepped out and took a look.  
'Ah. Well this is awkward. Maybe not _everything.' _he said, also feeling rather underwhelmed by their landing spot. 'Still!' he remarked 'It is rather pretty!'  
'Pretty, yes.' She said. 'Pretty boring! can we go somewhere else?'  
The Doctor looked at his feet, feeling slightly embarrassed. He's never taken a companion somewhere 'Boring' before.  
'Fine! We will!' he sulked, storming back into the magical blue box and muttering something under his breath about how the TARDIS did this on purpose.  
Amy smiled and turned to follow him, when she heard a voice coming from behind a nearby tree.  
_Yo ho ho ho, a Pirates life for me! _  
'Doctor!' she shouted. 'Did you hear that?!'  
The Doctor ran out the doors, beaming. 'Told you everything is an adventure!' he chuckled.  
The pair followed the singing untill they found the source; a rather drunk looking Pirate singing badly at the top of his voice.  
'Oh, 'ello there, mateys!' the Pirate hiccupped. 'D'ya want some rum? Plenty ta go around!'  
Amy politely refused the offer, and the Doctor asked him his name.  
'Name's Sparrow! Cap'n Jack Sparrow. Been stranded on this soddin' island fer ages! Almost outta rum!'  
'But you just said there was plenty?' Amy inquired.  
'Neva listen ta me, luv! I don't even know what I'm talkin' 'bout. Loosing me mind 'ere. Bein' stranded does strange things t'ya head. I'm even seein' people. Yer not even real!'  
'Doctor...' Amy whispered to her friend. 'He's a bit... Well... Crazy. We should help him.'  
'Oh, don't worry. Drunken rambling is perfectly normal for a pirate! We'll just drop him off at the nearest inhabited island and be on our way. Come along, Sparrow!' he beckoned Jack to the TARDIS. 'We'll take you back.'  
'Thanks, ye scurvy sea dog!' he stammered, patting the Doctor on the back wobbling towards the TARDIS, laughing as if he'd said something hilarious.  
'No... Problem? Just go through those doors.'  
Jack opened them and stepped inside.  
'Bilmey! I think I've 'ad enough rum fer now!' he exclaimed, taking in the impossibly large interior. Then he passed out on the TARDIS floor.  
'Well... shall we get going then?' the Doctor said cheerfully, casually stepping over the pirate sprawled across the floor as if it happened every day. 'Best not mention any of this to him when he wakes up, eh Amy? I'm sure he wont remember and it'll be much easier that way.'  
Amy nodded and prepared for flight.

oOoOoOo

Together, Amy and the Doctor carried the unconscious pirate out of the TARDIS and placed him on the ground. Jack stirred and muttered something illegible, then sat up and rubbed his head. He could defiantly feel a hangover coming along. He hoped desperately that he had some rum left after the previous night. How would he cope on that darn island without it?  
He looked around, his senses slowly returning to him. Where was he? In the distance, he saw a large town, clearly inhabited by many people. The surrounding area was full of greenery, and standing before him where two strangers - a man and a woman. They both looked remarkably familiar, but Jack couldn't put his finger on where he knew them from.  
'I had... been Marooned?' he stuttered, confused. 'How on _EARTH_ did I get here?!'  
'Ah... Well...' Amy began. 'We found you on an isla-'  
The Doctor shot her a look and Amy bit her tongue.  
'I mean... We saw you in the horizon, floating ashore. We helped you up onto dry land and you told us that you had escaped exile.'  
Jack nodded as he listened to the red-headed girl talk.  
'I see... My head is a little hazy, I don't remember this. Please tell me, m'lady, How exactly did I say that I had escaped exile?'  
'Oh, you said... Ummm... That you... You managed to attract a couple of Sea Turtles! Yes, that was it. And you roped them together to use as a raft!'  
'I... Roped them together? Using what, I had no rope?'  
'Oh, yes. You said that was a problem. But, you, I mean... In the end... You used your hair!'  
Jack looked sceptical. Could he really have achieved all of that? Well, the woman seemed honest enough, and he couldn't think of any other way of escape. He assumed this was the truth, or at least the closest to the truth he would ever get. He jumped up and looked the woman in the eyes, thanking her enthusiastically. 'That was rather clever of me, I must admit!' he laughed, then turned towards the town and walked away, ready to share his story with the world.

oOoOoOo

'You roped together some turtles with your hair and used them as a raft!' The Doctor jeered, mocking Amy's voice.  
Amy rolled her eyes and sighed, sinking into the chair in the TARDIS control room. Ever since they left the company of Jack Sparrow, the Doctor had been teasing her unfaltering.  
'Shut up!' She replied indignantly. 'He believed me, didn't he? Presides, I didn't exactly see you giving him an excuse. What was I supposed to say?!'  
The Doctor laughed, whacking buttons on the TARDIS console as he did so. The familiar whirring of the Time Rotor filled the room, and the two friends travelled on to their next (hopefully not boring) destination.


End file.
